My latest newsletter is live & I'm proud of this one: https://buttondown.com/impureleftist/archive/nurture-violence-and-collective-liberation/
Nurture, violence, and collective liberation
If you've ever tried to grow an email list, you've probably heard about the “nurture sequence.” It's a tactical series of emails meant to get a new lead to buy. It's also very similar to how politicians try to win us over, and how the new person you're dating will attempt to get on your good side.
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Everything in the world, really, comes down to nurture. How we nurture our relationships. Our planet. Our communities. Our bodies. Our children. How we are “nurtured”—genuinely or otherwise—by governments, corporations, religions, media, and influencers.
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Many systems around us have learned how to mimic genuine nurture. And this isn't always a bad thing. After all, infant formula saves many lives. And there are plenty of businesses that want to build real connections with their customers and offer services that truly improve your life, rather than suck your last dime out of the dredges of your soul. But in practice, we’re often surrounded by capitalist substitutes for meaningful nurture, instead of being plugged into the real thing.
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Humans have a deep need for belonging. When we lack the intimate, supportive community that feeds this part of us, we are easier to manipulate, and less effective in our activism. Many of us try to make up for an inner sense of rejection and loneliness by throwing ourselves into our work—and activism is a particularly attractive option when we lack meaning and belonging in our personal lives.
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Of course, activism can be a wonderful way to connect with others; the important thing is that we lay sustainable foundations. The quickest way to burn out is to lean on complex, amorphous systems to find validation and satisfaction. If anything, this is work where we must have great wells of emotional resilience to keep going in the face of defeat.
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So how can we cultivate genuine nurture—and discern how, and where, to find it?
1) Nurture can come from within. Self-compassion, re-parenting, and many other forms of spirituality or healing work can be done on our own.
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2) Nurture thrives in authentic relationships. The freer you are to be yourself, to show your real fears, and to be vulnerable, the more you're able to share and receive nurture—including asking for what you need.
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Nat