Brutkey

Low Quality Facts
@lowqualityfacts@mstdn.social
Low Quality Facts
@lowqualityfacts@mstdn.social

Close call.

The Cuban Missile Crisis was averted when a CIA agent called the Soviet Union and told them to stand down in a Russian accent, claiming to be the ghost of Joseph Stalin.
Low Quality Facts
@lowqualityfacts@mstdn.social
Low Quality Facts
@lowqualityfacts@mstdn.social

For the record, the cat has hallowed out that apple to go inside him. It effectively lobotomized him.

Low Quality Facts
@lowqualityfacts@mstdn.social

I am terribly sorry to interrupt your doomscrolling, but today's Low Quality Ad is for this Apple and Cat Plush. I dare you to name a more iconic duo than apples and cats. Peanut butter and jelly? Not even close. Batman and Robin? Never heard of them.
https://collabs.shop/yxsz6q

A plush white and brown calico cat popping out of a large, soft red apple. The apple has a simple smiling face and thin brown legs. A smaller, plain plush red apple sits next to it on a white textured surface.
Low Quality Facts
@lowqualityfacts@mstdn.social

No Mr. Bond, I expect you to tie.

There is a running gag across all James Bond movies that James does not know how to tie his shoes.
Low Quality Facts
@lowqualityfacts@mstdn.social

I saw Florence & The Machine play last night. Embarrassed to admit I didn't know she performs with an actual machine. I always figured it was just the name of the band. Great concert though, lots of beeps and boops. My favorite part was when the machine started loudly screeching "DEATH TO HUMANS!"

Low Quality Facts
@lowqualityfacts@mstdn.social
Low Quality Facts
@lowqualityfacts@mstdn.social

I guess three wasn't enough.

The Queen of England has three pet corgis, and she routinely drinks their blood to slow the aging process.
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@lowqualityfacts@mstdn.social

I am not saying that the lack of spices in food is the thing white people should be most ashamed of. I am just saying it is one of the many things we should be ashamed of.

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@lowqualityfacts@mstdn.social

Tonight's Low Quality Ad is for the Spice Adventure, which will send you new spices to try each month. I am begging my fellow white people to use spices. Our ancestors (wrongfully) conquered half the world for its spices and somehow we still don't utilize them.
https://collabs.shop/j5lsmq

A vibrant, warm-toned still life featuring various global spice blends from Raw Spice Bar. Several brown paper spice pouches, including "Berbere Blend," "Spanish Paella," and "Herbs de Provence," are arranged around a woven basket, decorative pottery, and a small camel figurine. In the background, three glowing red paper lanterns hang above a vintage globe. In the foreground, small mounds of colorful ground spices are displayed on a long slate serving board alongside recipe cards.