Fesshole 🧻
Fesshole 🧻Used to work for a company owned by a larger investment bank. Had to go to the head office in the City of London often. Train would get booked no question so a couple of times a year I'd get one booked and just have a day out in London by myself. Lovely stuff.
Fesshole 🧻Years ago I noticed the dog made the grass nice and green and lush where it pissed. After a bit of scientific tinkering I came to the conclusion that a 10:1 ratio of water to piss is perfect. Yes. I use my piss. It was too hard to catch the dogs.
Fesshole 🧻Just found out from an old school mate, who's kid attends our alma mater, that my 1984 5kg shotput record still stands. Feel terrible as I cheated with a 4kg shot.
Fesshole 🧻Between the age of 23 and 30 my Fridays consisted of underground club night until 3am and Pro Evolution on the PS2 until 6am. Saturdays similar but finished earlier because playing football Sunday morning. My wife believes she rescued me from this life.
Fesshole 🧻Few years ago after the surgeon performed my vasectomy, I looked down to see a big skid mark on the tissue cover that was on the bed. I didn't know what to say, so I said 'that's a big one isn't it'. Thank god I don't ever have to go back.
Fesshole 🧻I am an Englishman in a relationship with a Northern Irish lady. Recently my 10 year step son asked us what a prostitute was. We decided to be honest and tell him straight, it's people who sell themselves for sex. He was horrified. He meant protestant.
Fesshole 🧻I'm a female CEO & ultimately the decision maker when hiring for high level management & executive positions in the company. I've hired more women for senior positions than men. The simple reason being because men keep ignoring me & talking to my male PA/notetaker in interviews.
Fesshole 🧻I was today years old (read: 54 years too late) when I realised the tag on a fitted sheet is supposed to go on the bottom right corner of the bed. Genuinely life-changing. I've been wrestling linen like an amateur for decades.
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Fesshole run/edited by Rob Manuel of b3ta.com
Fesshole 🧻My partner of 13 years has turned into a serial moaner, so much so I have started creating a moan diary for my own amusement logging them. 18 moans yesterday about money, tiredness and "all these biscuits look the fucking same". Can't wait to see how many it is today, exciting.