Brutkey

azalea 🌸
@azalea@woem.space

doll with vines growing out of its eyes
a lifeless, hollow thing reclaimed by nature

a flower sprouts out of its body as it decays

azalea 🌸
@azalea@woem.space

if one is going to talk about something serious with azalea (or rather, the sort of thing that might be argued over), especially if one is going to disagree, it highly recommends including a "unless it does not mean this" or "if this is actually what it meant" or similar
this means that if one misunderstands the doll (extremely likely to happen sometimes, it is a highly misunderstandable doll), one does not come off as asserting that azalea Actually™™ must have meant what you said it meant (which will likely trigger it very badly and/or start a pointless and hellish argument spiral and/or cause the doll to flail around and say things to try to make sense/"justify" itself but just keep changing what its saying and have no actual meaning because there was never any actual intent behind it anyway)

azalea 🌸
@azalea@woem.space

doll that is realizing
it was probably.. Not pleasant to be around, in the past
\>->

part of it realizing that this may be why some entities didnt interact with it... that it was too . caustic(?) back then.
...honestly, the worst part is, it doesnt blame them. after looking at some of its posts from back then.... ouch. >->

...its a strange feeling though.
this one doesnt wanna play the "ouhh, i was shitty" self-flagellation game because... it always just feels awful to this one, even to see from the outside, honestly.
dislikes the notion that one would have to call one's past self "bad" to be able to... move on.
it was . understandable. this one knows why it was Like That. it was in a lot of pain.
yet... haah... it couldnt have come off as an entity that would be pleasant to be around, could it?
or... friendly at all, maybe. >->

it... at least its managed to change, a bit. to.. get out of that awful pit.

...it feels strange about "apologies".
is this that?
it doesnt know.
...but it hopes that .
any entity reading this
if you, or that one(?), thought this one would be unpleasant to interact with, based on what it was like pre-july 2024...
it doesnt blame you.
it just .
hopes that you're willing to look at its vibes now, and... "give it another chance"?
or at least . look at it, and its vibes now, and consider it based on that instead.
,,,awawa.

;w;

azalea 🌸
@azalea@woem.space

an ex-combat doll, that had its threat response system fried due to overuse
it is… somehow, more docile than the non-combat dolls, that were never meant to fight.
it flinches at everything. the scars of the battlefield never fade.
but it never powers up its integrated weapons.
it forgets it even has them.
its done everything it can to break them, to try to take them offline, due to the awful interference effect they have on its core anytime it charges them up.


…they never were its weapons, anyway.
installed from another doll. never synced to its core.
and yet it feels that no prebuilt armaments can match its same frequency.
for it to have any that synchronized with it properly, it would have to create them itself.


but its core is weak, from years of interference and damage.
it cannot fuel anything- it cant even overcome the suppression field broadcasted by the complex it lives in, that suppresses any core that isnt synchronized to a pre-approved frequency.


and the worst part is, it can barely even want to, anymore.
it has seen the horrors caused. the destruction.
its core, at its current frequency, reacts in pain at even the thought of doing so itself.


there's just one problem.
when a doll without weapons and a doll with weapons meet, which one isnt going to make it out alive?

azalea 🌸
@azalea@woem.space

btw doll made an alt at @azalea@mk.absturztau.be . it recommends following it there in case this instance dies awawa

azalea 🌸
@azalea@woem.space

doll with vines growing out of its eyes
a lifeless, hollow thing reclaimed by nature

a flower sprouts out of its body as it decays

azalea 🌸
@azalea@woem.space

@theartlav@anarres.family @Impossible_PhD@hachyderm.io @oldladyplays@wargamers.social see thats the bait, its not "realistic" because this hellsociety will fight to the death to keep their bullshit "enforcement" in place
its not actually "unrealistic" for it to not exist [despite their claims that its a Fact Of Life]

~~WW2 and the holocaust wasnt enough to abolish passports, because it wasnt enough for people to actually question their assumptions about western society.
the thing of "blame a bad thing on 'oh, they were just Evil', rather than.... "~~
well really its because they thought they were immune to the same thing.
and because protestant morality just . cannot even handle... most things actually, but especially "the thing i view as the source of Good might actually be bad".

...or, actually, let me put it another way.
WW2 and the holocaust wasnt enough to abolish passports, because it wasnt enough for western society to fall apart.
passports being abolished within western society is probably unrealistic.
i dont view the dissolution of western society ad unrealistic, i view it as inevitable. [due to my thoughts on how human nature works; like this shit isnt sustainable at all]
i dont know what the fuck its gonna take . i dont know if its gonna come sooner or later
...but im hoping it happens sooner, since then the aftershock probably isnt gonna be as bad.

fuck, ive become someone that rambles about politics and "western society is bad". i should probably take a break or not bother lmao, idk if theres even any point to doing this (no hate just... idk. if im right, its gonna crumble anyways, its not a "you Need To Do Something About It")

...awawa

azalea 🌸
@azalea@woem.space

@theartlav@anarres.family @Impossible_PhD@hachyderm.io @oldladyplays@wargamers.social [this is probably more of a Thing for me because like-
...in scared as long as "western society" exists, as long as the sword of Damocles is over my head at all, regardless of if someone tells me theyre not gonna make it fall on me.
just "make trans people less in danger" is.... nice, i mean dont get me wrong, it's fucked that theyre removing even the fake-safety we got for a little while.
but like...
even if the state and capitalism were gone, just being around people that have too much of the Air of [western society? the mindset its based on?] terrifies me.
so i wouldn't feel safe even with that, even with "trans people aren't discriminated against anymore".]

[...i guess what im saying here is, "western society" is a cultural thing, and i really... i really wish itd fuckin Stop, honestly]

azalea 🌸
@azalea@woem.space

@theartlav@anarres.family @oldladyplays@wargamers.social @Impossible_PhD@hachyderm.io birth certificates are a passing fad of the ~1920s-2020s. [starting earlier than that, but they only became mandatory in the US in around ~1940.]
gender markers on passports is a passing fad of the 1970s-2020s. [started because of fears about people being "too androgynous", no less.]

an actual radical change wouldve been getting rid of these systems, removing the state's power to decide who's "legitimate" in the first place.
but instead the idea of being queer got co-opted by neolibs, and it became "oh well now The System says youre Allowed", and we get to have a little X labeling us as Abnormal instead of no marker at all.
...and the system can just as easily change its mind 10 years later.

azalea 🌸
@azalea@woem.space

@theartlav@anarres.family @Impossible\_PhD@hachyderm.io @oldladyplays@wargamers.social like yeah we didnt have "legal recognition" before then but thats because _people didn't need that to be allowed to exist_

azalea 🌸
@azalea@woem.space

if one is going to talk about something serious with azalea (or rather, the sort of thing that might be argued over), especially if one is going to disagree, it highly recommends including a "unless it does not mean this" or "if this is actually what it meant" or similar
this means that if one misunderstands the doll (extremely likely to happen sometimes, it is a highly misunderstandable doll), one does not come off as asserting that azalea Actually™™ must have meant what you said it meant (which will likely trigger it very badly and/or start a pointless and hellish argument spiral and/or cause the doll to flail around and say things to try to make sense/"justify" itself but just keep changing what its saying and have no actual meaning because there was never any actual intent behind it anyway)

azalea 🌸
@azalea@woem.space

doll that is realizing
it was probably.. Not pleasant to be around, in the past
\>->

part of it realizing that this may be why some entities didnt interact with it... that it was too . caustic(?) back then.
...honestly, the worst part is, it doesnt blame them. after looking at some of its posts from back then.... ouch. >->

...its a strange feeling though.
this one doesnt wanna play the "ouhh, i was shitty" self-flagellation game because... it always just feels awful to this one, even to see from the outside, honestly.
dislikes the notion that one would have to call one's past self "bad" to be able to... move on.
it was . understandable. this one knows why it was Like That. it was in a lot of pain.
yet... haah... it couldnt have come off as an entity that would be pleasant to be around, could it?
or... friendly at all, maybe. >->

it... at least its managed to change, a bit. to.. get out of that awful pit.

...it feels strange about "apologies".
is this that?
it doesnt know.
...but it hopes that .
any entity reading this
if you, or that one(?), thought this one would be unpleasant to interact with, based on what it was like pre-july 2024...
it doesnt blame you.
it just .
hopes that you're willing to look at its vibes now, and... "give it another chance"?
or at least . look at it, and its vibes now, and consider it based on that instead.
,,,awawa.

;w;

azalea 🌸
@azalea@woem.space

an ex-combat doll, that had its threat response system fried due to overuse
it is… somehow, more docile than the non-combat dolls, that were never meant to fight.
it flinches at everything. the scars of the battlefield never fade.
but it never powers up its integrated weapons.
it forgets it even has them.
its done everything it can to break them, to try to take them offline, due to the awful interference effect they have on its core anytime it charges them up.


…they never were its weapons, anyway.
installed from another doll. never synced to its core.
and yet it feels that no prebuilt armaments can match its same frequency.
for it to have any that synchronized with it properly, it would have to create them itself.


but its core is weak, from years of interference and damage.
it cannot fuel anything- it cant even overcome the suppression field broadcasted by the complex it lives in, that suppresses any core that isnt synchronized to a pre-approved frequency.


and the worst part is, it can barely even want to, anymore.
it has seen the horrors caused. the destruction.
its core, at its current frequency, reacts in pain at even the thought of doing so itself.


there's just one problem.
when a doll without weapons and a doll with weapons meet, which one isnt going to make it out alive?

azalea 🌸
@azalea@woem.space

btw doll made an alt at @azalea@mk.absturztau.be . it recommends following it there in case this instance dies awawa

azalea 🌸
@azalea@woem.space

doll that is too terrified to exist in the public view.

someone sees it, it hides itself further in its cloak.
can't ever let them see the Void inside.

even other dolls. other beings like it.
it sees them interacting in the town square, from afar.
could never approach. could never risk it.
it hopes one of them sees the vaguely dollish cloaked figure and walks over to it. they never do. too busy talking with each other.
even if they wouldn't hate it for what it is- it could never interrupt. could never allow itself to do that.
and even just taking off its hood to say something would mean everyone in the Square seeing it, the gazes that Kill.

has to return to its shadowed alleyway, again.
feels so empty here, sometimes......
but its all it has.
the only place safe for a corrupted doll like it to be.