Edmonds_ScannerBe kind and stay weird.
Edmonds_ScannerMy hope for you is that you always feel safe and warm, and that you will someday find yourself surrounded by wild Muppets in the heart of the forest, with plenty of wine & books and without a care in the world.
Edmonds_ScannerDream of greener things, and the silence that surrounds them.
Edmonds_ScannerDon't forget to rest.
Don't forget to hydrate.
Don't forget to give yourself grace.
Don't forget to sharpen your antlers and claws.
Don't forget to disappear into the darkness between the trees and find yourself again in the shadows.
Edmonds_ScannerYour daily horoscope:
Today you are an angry bear, with your attitude waning and claws rising.
Edmonds_ScannerWhat do you dream about?
Edmonds_ScannerNo matter where you are on your life's journey, the forest will always be there for you.
Most of the trees are nice folk, the owls like to gossip, and the moss is always ready to accept you, embrace you, and help return your atoms to the universe.
Edmonds_ScannerYour daily horoscope:
Today will feel like gum - flavorful at first, then a tasteless chore that sticks around too long.
Edmonds_ScannerRelaxation tips:
- put down your phone
- breathe deeply
- craft effigies of your enemies out of bones & hair
- bury these effigies deep in the misty woods
- summon forgotten gods and listen to stories of the old days, when moss & magic ruled the earth
- have some tea
Edmonds_ScannerRepeat after me:
May the forest grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to shamble slowly through the shadows, and wisdom to embrace the mossy darkness.
Edmonds_ScannerYour daily horoscope:
Today you will feel like a swamp - messy, murky, mysterious, and good at making things disappear.
Edmonds_ScannerWhat's your favorite snack?