In Canadian satire, The Beaverton reports as Trumpβs ex, Elon Musk, releases a new baby name book, βFrom Arargnft to Zrrfppforttβ.
https://www.red-state-blues.com/2025/08/09/week-of-the-epstein-everlast-dodging-defending-fox-ignoring-more-trump-creepiness-lies-loathing-from-the-public-gerrymandering-racism-ice/#beaverton
Right Wing Watch brings conservative personalities John Zmirak and Eric Metaxas joining to back Tulsi Gabbard (and, of course, her boss) in weaving together all the deep state plots into one megaβconspiracy involving pretty much everyone Trump hates:
Barack Obama,
Hillary Clinton,
Mike Pence,
Lindsey Graham,
John McCain,
and many more.
Watch, but hold your nose:
https://www.red-state-blues.com/2025/08/09/week-of-the-epstein-everlast-dodging-defending-fox-ignoring-more-trump-creepiness-lies-loathing-from-the-public-gerrymandering-racism-ice/#rightwingwatch
In other gag-with-a-spoon news, Mr.Golf brings us Mr. Trumpβs inner feelings about his Press Secretaryβs lips:
https://www.red-state-blues.com/2025/08/09/week-of-the-epstein-everlast-dodging-defending-fox-ignoring-more-trump-creepiness-lies-loathing-from-the-public-gerrymandering-racism-ice/#TrumpOnLeavittLips
Juliet at Decoding Fox News watches for 25 hours and summarizes the coverage of the Epstein files, which is to say almost nothing.
Almost, but not quite, nothing.
There is some indignation about all the indignation:
https://www.red-state-blues.com/2025/08/09/week-of-the-epstein-everlast-dodging-defending-fox-ignoring-more-trump-creepiness-lies-loathing-from-the-public-gerrymandering-racism-ice/#decodingfoxnews
At The Onion, a revealing photo as Trump readjusts a golf tee in JD Vanceβs mouth.
https://www.red-state-blues.com/2025/08/09/week-of-the-epstein-everlast-dodging-defending-fox-ignoring-more-trump-creepiness-lies-loathing-from-the-public-gerrymandering-racism-ice/#theonion
In Hackwhackers, officials who should be dispassionately seeking the facts (Just the facts, Maβam), were planning to meet with JD Vance to weave together a consistent narrative on the Epstein case.
Uh oh. The schedule leaked. The meetingβs off!!
Um⦠How about just moving it around? And this time NO leaks!
The meetingβs ON!!
Aw crud! It leaked again.
https://www.red-state-blues.com/2025/08/09/week-of-the-epstein-everlast-dodging-defending-fox-ignoring-more-trump-creepiness-lies-loathing-from-the-public-gerrymandering-racism-ice/#hackwhackers
driftglass presents the Trump fantasy about what is, or at least what he wishes was, in the Epstein list, along with what is turning out to be reality.
https://www.red-state-blues.com/2025/08/09/week-of-the-epstein-everlast-dodging-defending-fox-ignoring-more-trump-creepiness-lies-loathing-from-the-public-gerrymandering-racism-ice/#driftglass
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Via The Tennessee Holler, hereβs Newsmax host Greg Kelly suggesting poor Ghislaine might be a mere victim, explaining that there was a rush to judgment. He grants that she hung out with Jeffrey Epstein and β¦ thatβs apparently not good, but it hardly justifies a twentyβyear sentence:
I have some thoughts.
https://www.red-state-blues.com/2025/08/09/week-of-the-epstein-everlast-dodging-defending-fox-ignoring-more-trump-creepiness-lies-loathing-from-the-public-gerrymandering-racism-ice/#DefendingGhislaine
2/2
Now This Impact brings us more as Kelly goes on to suggest that thereβs a hell of a lot of evidence that sheβs innocent, the victim of a deep state plot. He preemptively congratulates Trump for standing by her. After all, just because Epstein did horrible things, that doesnβt mean Ghislaine is also guilty:
A-n-d...I have some thoughts.
https://www.red-state-blues.com/2025/08/09/week-of-the-epstein-everlast-dodging-defending-fox-ignoring-more-trump-creepiness-lies-loathing-from-the-public-gerrymandering-racism-ice/#DefendingGhislaine
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Via The Tennessee Holler, hereβs Newsmax host Greg Kelly suggesting poor Ghislaine might be a mere victim, explaining that there was a rush to judgment. He grants that she hung out with Jeffrey Epstein and β¦ thatβs apparently not good, but it hardly justifies a twentyβyear sentence:
I have some thoughts.
https://www.red-state-blues.com/2025/08/09/week-of-the-epstein-everlast-dodging-defending-fox-ignoring-more-trump-creepiness-lies-loathing-from-the-public-gerrymandering-racism-ice/#DefendingGhislaine
While almost everyone, even those in MAGAville, focus on the Epstein/Trump files, a substantial minority of MAGA influencers are lumping together to make an improbable case for Ghislaine Maxwell.
News Corpse points to Greg Kelly of Newsmax fame as one of several MAGA personalities now coalescing around Maxwell as a victim and is having none of it.
https://www.red-state-blues.com/2025/08/09/week-of-the-epstein-everlast-dodging-defending-fox-ignoring-more-trump-creepiness-lies-loathing-from-the-public-gerrymandering-racism-ice/#newscorpse